2023 was a very difficult year.  
After visiting with my new neurologist, who informed me my diagnosis was actually PPMS, 
I contracted (long) Covid. Then she moved away.
Upon having medical test done, I contracted an infection.
I broke down physically and mentally, and was hospitalized for both.

I have refused tests, appointments, with any hospital/dr. since.
And instead decided to Schrödinger cat it.
As long as I don’t look inside, I could be healing.

The weakness in my arms worsened. Making simple every day tasks much harder.
I stoped painting, I stoped writing, and I put my camera away.
I got a new, more permanent, wheelchair.

Then, for my peace of mind, I went to stay at our cabin in the mountains.
Where I could mourn the way I grew up doing it, alone.
I spend my days resting, coloring, and losing myself in the view.
And as I watched the trees stand still and strong , I would think “maybe being rooted isn’t so bad.”