Month: July 2017

My Walhs/paleo-ish lifestyle.

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What is the Walhs – Paleo diet.

According to dr. Terry Walhs, one of the best ways to treat MS is with 9 cups of vegetables per day (3 cups each of greens, sulfure rich, and coloured veggies) and some healthy grass fed organic free range hormone&nitrate free protein. She is way more technical but the idea is that if I give my body the nutrients it needs it will function better. That is the Walhs part of the diet. If you were to pour juice into your car, or cola into your garden, they wouldn’t function or grow properly. The same goes for the human body. So I can’t put grains, legumes, dairy, sugar, or processed foods into my body. That is the paleo part of the diet.

Is she right, I don’t know but it makes sense.

The lifestyle is annoying to follow. I would much rather not have to worry about what I’m eating. (Wouldn’t we all like that). But the lifestyle has been helping. It’s increased my energy, helped with nausea and stomach issues, I’ve lost weight, the dry patch I had on my hand is gone, I feel more clear headed, and I even sleep better.

Unfortunately I spend most of my new found energy preparing food. Also, I’m the only one eating this way in our household so I occasionally have to prepare multiple dishes. YES! I’m aware it could be beneficial for the rest of the family to follow this lifestyle. I encourage them to eat well, I teach them about food, about making healthy decisions, that too much of a good thing can be bad (they’ve all heard about my peach story), and the rest I leave up to them. If they feel fine after eating a bowl of cereal, then they can go right on ahead and do it. For me, it’s all about feeling better.

I use the term “ish” (see title) because YES sometimes I stray. I get tired of making my own mayo and dressing. I have MS, two small kids, and a husband who doesn’t know how to sauté anything (he thinks sauté means slap it). I cook a lot, and I get tired. So I use store bought mayo on occasion. On vacation I ate the local cuisine, and on my birthday I ordered an entree of breaded shrimp and a dessert. (None of which follow the rules). In some chat rooms I would of gotten the third degree and a reminder about the rules. I KNOW THE RULES! MY rule is if I’m on vacation or if it’s my birthday I can do whatever I want. I know how I feel afterwards so I don’t do it often. But in general, I follow the rules.

I’ve been following this lifestyle on & off for the past 5 years. On-“ish” for 7 months now.  I recommend it for anyone with health issues, but I won’t try to shove it down your throats. I know the difficulties it comes with. But if anyone wants to learn more you can check out dr. Terry Walhs’s video at: https://youtu.be/KLjgBLwH3Wc or read her book: https://www.amazon.ca/Wahls-Protocol-Radical-Autoimmune-Conditions/dp/1583335544/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1500824088&sr=1-1&keywords=the+wahls+protocol.

I’m posting this because I may on occasion post pictures of my meals in order to help those in the same boat who may be running out of meal ideas. Also, I want to show I’m making efforts to try to get better. Like this 100% homemade lovely paleo breakfast of coconut waffle topped with a pâté made of chicken livers and hearts, garlic, and onions (It looks like poop and taste like it too). Served with fresh fruit to mask the taste. Mmmm?

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So in the end I would like to say “Bon Appétit”, what ever you may be eating….

A germaphobe in the making

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Am I a germaphobe, not quite but I’m right on the edge.
Do I like things clean, sure. Am I constantly cleaning, no.
Do I run away in fear when someone is sick, no but I would if I could.
Do I use those antiseptic machines, yes … every time I see one.
Do I hug my family when they’re sick, I try not to. I would go live somewhere else for the duration of their illness if I could.
Do I feel good about that, no.
Do I fear sick people, yes. I hold my breath, I panic, I try to get as far away as I can. I look for antiseptic, I wash my hands over and over, I cover my face, and I pray I don’t catch it (not to god but religion is a blog for another time).
Was I always like this, not at all.

Why, because I have MS which is a neurological autoimmune disorder. I get sick and my immune system goes crazy and kills everything, including the myelin cover protecting my nerves. And there’s no way to fix it. I woke up once with a slight fever and I was paralyzed from the waist down, I could move my arms but barely. It took me 3 weeks before I was able to leave the house. (This is years after being diagnosed)

I take medicine to relax my immune system (let’s call my immune system Joe). So if I get a cold, “drugged out Joe” just relaxes. “dude, we’re being attacked, I should totally do something about that”. But Joe doesn’t do something about that, or at least he’s in no hurry.

I’m bringing this up, because I just spent the last week with a cold feeling TERRIBLE, barely able to walk, unable to paint, unable to cook (not that it matters because I can’t go to the grocery store anyways), barely able to focus, and most importantly unable to care for my kids. This.. f-ing cold is starting to pass and so I can focus again (hence write) but I’m still sick (hence really grumpy and ranting).

I would love to stop taking these meds so I can get over colds quicker . LOVE! But then I remember why I’m taking them. Because I went from being a healthy, vibrant, energetic, active woman….to being PARALYZED by the flu….PARALYZED! I fear I could wake up one day and be paralyzed NOT because of the flu. This “choice” about whether or not to take the meds didn’t feel like much of a choice and it wasn’t done without contemplation. It’s also not the only thing I’m doing (Walhs diet/lifestyle, physiotherapy, chiropractors, EMS, energy stones, aromatherapy, meditation, supplements, vitamins, probiotics, …) nor is it the only thing I’m contemplating. (stem cell transplant for people with MS?).

I’m not angry, I sound angry, sometimes I might be angry. And I’m not sad, sometimes yes but mostly no. I’m just tired, so so tired, overwhelmingly exhausted worn out tired. I just need to vent sometimes. I am a frustrated warrior.

And obviously I need to avoid germs.

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Why I decided to start a blog

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Blog entry #1

Why I decided to start a blog.

Aside from ” it’s what all the cool kids are doing nowadays”, I thought it could be somewhat therapeutic for me. A few years after I was diagnosed with MS I got pregnant and then my life completely changed. I became a mom, my responsibilities changed, my body changed (therefore my wardrobe changed), my health changed, I had to stop working, I was dependent on someone else which was (and still is) really uncomfortable, and we moved to a new neighbourhood so my entourage changed (friends, restaurants), It was A LOT of change all at once and I felt incredibly lonely. I became somewhat withdrawn and closed off more and more over the years. I love my kids and our house but it came at a price. I lost myself.
This is me trying to find myself again. Or I guess redefine myself.

My husband (as well as others) have recommended I go to group therapy (always nice to hear, but I know it comes from a place of concern and love), and I even thought of getting a dog.
But I don’t like large gatherings or the idea of opening up to a bunch of strangers (face to face). And as to getting a dog….well I know the kids would love a dog. And having the quiet non judgemental unconditional love of a dog to keep me company during the day would surely be therapeutic. But I do not (and I can’t stress this enough), I do NOT want to pick up poop or be woken up at 5am cause he needs to “go”. My unwillingness to clean up dog poop, and my need for a good night sleep, are far greater then my need for emotional therapy….blame the almost OCD clean freak in me. Ain’t gonna happen.

So, a blog it is.

Regardless, after some soul searching I realized I don’t feel lonely
1. Because I have a great husband and two sometimes adorable kids.
2. Because I’m a big time introvert. So time to myself is awesome.
3. Because I have some great friends I can call anytime, I don’t, but I know I could and that brings me great comfort. I don’t have many friends, but the ones I do have are awesome.

What I do feel is lost.
1. Because I can’t let go of who I was.
2. Because I can’t let go of what I wanted.
3. Because I can’t figure out what I want.

So I figured if I start a blog I can give others a glimpse of who I am outside of the MS and BECAUSE of it. And hopefully find myself in the process. It has already started to help since I know I want to paint, I want to write, and I want to share…from a distance.

Sometimes I draw or paint in order to express myself. But my art is mostly abstract so my thoughts can often be … misinterpreted. But there will be nothing abstract about putting pen to paper, or fingers to keyboard in this case. I am not who I am. Which is occasionally my inspiration for my “art” (things aren’t always as they seem). I am not “the sick friend”. I want to change that perception, play a different part in your lives. I get it now when an actor wants to leave a role in a hit show. I want a new role. I am more then “the girl you know who has MS”.
I’m also a fucking mess 😉

So here I am, cautiously revealing myself…..IMG_2049